PlayStation 4
Released in 2019 by Loren Lemcke and Digerati
Grade: B+
Bearing an obvious resemblance to 1988’s Ice Hockey on NES, and adding buckets of pixelated blood, Super Blood Hockey is raw fun and hilarity. In the spirit of a simpler time in video games, its basic gameplay rewards sheer button-mashing willpower.
Where it falls in the series
It’s on its own for now. It was originally released on Steam in 2017, and came to current gen consoles in 2019. It’s a download only, and I got this sucker from the PS Store for less than $4!
Praises and gripes
That 2D side-view sure is charming, mixing nicely with simple controls (shoot, pass, check, change player) and the classic fat/medium/skinny lineup of player types. There are eight national teams, including North Korea, lol. There’s some distinctly retro sounding music and crisp sound effects.
The pixelated blood and snow shoots all over the place the entire time. It looks obnoxious as hell, but I found it easy to deal with when playing the game. If you really can’t stand it, you can turn it off in the options, but the silly snow squares still flutter around.
The action is predictably dumbed down. Even though your players have distinct bodies, they damn sure don’t play distinct positions. Every player basically follows the puck, leading to crowded pileups in front of the net and a total lack of defensive positioning. The players keep sliding around and there are body checks galore. The action tends to alternate between offensive flurries, and when the other team gets control, they can usually skate all the way up ice for their turn on offense. It’s pretty telling that you can do 4-on-8 and 12-on-12 challenge modes and the action feels almost the same as the usual 4-on-4.
I initially found it difficult to score, with touchy aiming that sends a lot of shots at the post. So I headed over to the “Tutorial” mode, where the coach explained, “I don’t know what went wrong with your generation, but people used to appreciate a challenge.” He then sent the team into the showers to learn how to fight.
The key to fighting, of course, is mashing the punch button faster than your opponent. This piece of age-old wisdom comes in handy during games, because if your team loses a brawl, you’ll give up a powerplay while your teammate convulses on the ice and spews blood like a fountain.
Put it all together, and … it’s actually good! This game is shallow but fun. It’s challenging in a gritty, simple way. The control feels right. The movement seems slow at first, but the action gets really chaotic at times. All the charms are well put together. There are five difficulty levels and even a franchise mode, which is actually a very dark, cynical, twisted RPG. Super Blood Hockey probably won’t hold your interest over the long haul, but it’s a great novelty game to have, especially considering the dirt cheap price.